What a concept

David Ortiz promises he’ll “play hard” for the Red Sox this year, even though they only agreed to pay him $12.5 million instead of renegotiating his contract. What a sport!

Of course, to actually earn $12.5 million, David would need to hit 50 home runs, rack up 125 RBIs, teach a year of high school algebra, rescue five people from burning buildings, respond to 127 police emergencies and cure cancer.

Alternatively, he could work on Wall Street, cost thousands of teachers, firemen, police officers their life savings, and still get a $12.5 million bonus. Gotta love America.

 

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